The Beauty Of The Broken You

Sitting in my room relaxing on this Sunday evening, its one of those rare days in California where its raining. The sound is enough to calm you into a sweet lullaby. Though I love a good nap my head is reeling. Thinking of things that we often take for granted, simple things, time, happiness, memories, a kiss...We give them so freely, and yet don't realize how precious they are. What happens when you are unable to give what you once gave so freely? What if there was no more time, no more kisses, and all you have are the memories? I took a road trip this weekend, and it was the most simple road trip. We went nowhere special, there was no plan when we left the house. We didn't talk about how we were gonna get there or the plan to come back, we simply just went. Giving each other our time, sharing our happiness and making memories, but the kisses, so many kisses. It is often hard to understand how much they all mean until you don't know when you will get that chance again....

Today was one of those days, you know the one when you just can't wait for it to end. The kind where  all you can imagine is a drink in one hand and the remote in the other. After working a 12 hour day it was all I could do to not run out of the office screaming "later suckers". Although in my moment of glory I did mumble some shit like "maybe I will see you tomorrow". Which now has literally made it impossible to take a sick day. When I was walking to the elevator I couldn't help but think, is this all that my life is? Work, home, work again, and the occasional girls night out with friends? What is it we are all working for anyways? Is there really something more to this life than any of us have figured out, and if so what is the secret to success? As I head to my car and I meet up with some random workers from other offices in the building I work in and they all seem just as happy to escape the humdrum office we all occupy daily. I catch their comments, ...

It isn't hard to find a woman who has dreamt of their future. The moment we all wait for, that one we as little girls are conditioned to dream of.  The movies and cartoons that feed us the dream of love and how one day our prince will come. What a bunch of bullshit! We buy into it cause we hope that one day we will find that perfect ending. What if there really is no prince charming? What if the beast is just a beast? Living in a city where there is so much to do so many people to meet, it is hard not to meet a variety of people daily. Yet we have dating websites, speed dating, social media, you name it there is a way to connect. We are connected by our smart phones, computers, friendships, and just the everyday interactions we have. So, how is it a single girl somehow can't find the perfect guy? My story isn't that of a fairy tale, it isn't about a Beauty who finds love and lives her happily ever after. Mine is a story of a Beauty who meets a man who is so good at ...

In a world where we are conditioned to make our relationships work, whether they be friendships, work, significant others, marriage… You get where I am going with this. At least I hope you do. At what point do we throw in the white flag and finally say “I give up!”? Is it easier to break up to make up? So many of us stay in a situation, because it is easier than starting over. We do this with our jobs, friendships, relationships, even our hairstylists. We all have that one hairstylist who has ruined our hair. We swear we aren’t going back and there we are 8 weeks later giving her a second chance. Hoping this time will be better than the last. We do it in love too. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve broken up with my ex just to go back, try again and convince myself this time it will be different. If you can’t talk yourself into it, who will? Now, I will be the first to tell you each time I went back I had a great reason, in my own head.   Yes, that is where it’s most imp...